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January 27, 2010

State Of The _______

Filed under: Reader Mail — Elim @ 16:36


It’s Wednesday, January 27, 2010 and we once again dip into the Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean mail bag.

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Hello Elim,

I said “Death to sub-freezing temperatures and snow!” but I see that had no effect. I like your new segment “Death to This Sort of Thing.” I showed the picture to my brother-in-law and he was not at all amused. He’s one of the people that occasionally takes to the street to yell, break things and otherwise behave badly. He only attends the approved demonstrations, but these too somehow manage to get out of hand and something gets burned or broken.

I think we have decided on the Greek Islands for our vacation this year, but will wait for spring. This seems foolish to me, since spring time here is quite pleasant, but like any man who has been married to the same woman for 33 years, I know when it is time for foolishness.

Allahu Akbahr!

SiAmack


Hi SiAmack,

The Greek Isles sounds nice. I’m with you though, springtime in Montana is my second favorite time of the year. If I were to take a vacation now, it would be to someplace warm.

Glad you like the new feature. I wonder what I’ll come up with this week in that there’s just not enough things I care enough about to say “Death to that thing!” People being what they are, I’m sure something will turn up.

Elim




Hi Elim,

Well, she left me again. This time I think for good. I was reading your blog and she wanted to know what I was laughing at. She read back through and as my miserable luck would have it, landed on the one where I wrote you about giving her the perfume with catfish bait in it.
She went outside and poured a whole bottle of perfume on the front seat of my car! I Googled for a way to get it out, but finally had to replace the seat.

I sure hope that Karma thing has gone all the way around now.

I wound up keeping the doctored set. You just never know when something like that might come in handy.

Kramer


Hi Kramer,

Dude, you need to get rid of that crap and do it soon! That stuff is bringing you bad luck and the fact that you anticipate using it again only ensures that Karma is gonna have its way with you again.

Sorry about your girlfriend, but man, you brought this all on yourself.

One Swift Kick to you.

Elim




LETTER OF THE WEEK

I believe this economy issue is a trickle effect from Bush administration – so please place the blame where it belongs on Bush. Five years ago the good people of the United States never should have voted him in for a second term. I believe we will see good things come out of the Obama administration after they fix the mess Bush left this country in. American’s love Obama!!!!!

C Ramirez


Hi C,

You get no argument from me that this economic fiasco got under way during the Bush administration. That being said, Obama has had a year now to do something, anything to turn things around and has only succeeded in making things worse. You only get to blame things on your predecessor for a year, then you own it, lock, stock and barrel.

I also agree that Bush should not have been reelected, but given the alternative…

I do however disagree that “good things” can be expected from the Obama administration. I think now the expectation is “tolerable things” given that the republicans can now slam the breaks on the train to socialism. Great things lie ahead once the republicans take back control of Congress.

I expect especially great things if the conservatives can regain control of the Republican Party, but that is fodder for another blog.

Finally, Americans may in fact love Obama, but an increasing amount of them aren’t all that happy with President Obama.

Two Hand Salutes for you.

Elim




Elim,

Thinking about what your next job should be, you should be a therapist. I know a lot of people that you could make all better by just a good talking to and maybe a slap or a good, swift kick.

Miles


Hi Miles,

Good idea. I like the idea of having people pay me to tell them what I think of them. Unfortunately, I can’t envision a bunch of people lining to have verbal abuse heaped upon them, much less so physical assault.

I once had to (as in “You are hereby ordered”) endure the company of a psychiatrist due to my involvement in an unfortunate incident. The guy was a flake and seemed strangely obsessed with whether or not I was breast fed.

Apparently, my not knowing was indicative of some deep-seated emotional issue and only by exploring the problem of “why I chose not to know this” could we draw the problem to the surface and deal with it.

I’m not knocking mental health workers, but dammit, the absence of problems is NOT in and of itself an indicator of problems.

Thanks for the recommendation. Three Hand Salutes for you.

More career advice follows

Elim




Hi Elim,

You should be on Fox. You make more sense than O’Reilly and Beck and at least seem to have an open mind.

Greg

Hi Greg,

Plus, I’m better looking than those guys.

I’ll wait for Fox to call me.

Elim




Hey,

Love the “Death to This” thing. I don’t think we’ll ever, ever break free from a two party system, but I think there’s probably a lot of people for whom neither the democrats or republican parties are a good fit. I think both parties are guilty of not sticking to their core values, but rather changing them to try to get the most votes.

Butch


Hi Butch,

I think you may be right that we’re stuck. I’m hoping that the so-called “tea party republicans” can wield some clout and rotate out some of the RINO incumbents. For instance, Arizona Senator John McCain is probably going to be challenged in the primary by a former Arizona Congressman J.D. Hayworth. This should make for an interesting race.

Elim




Interesting point. I try to understand the frequency of updates?

Raw Food Diet


Hi Raw Food Diet,

That’s a strange expression, Bruce.

Elim




My bag runneth empty. Remember, the only way to get free, 100% genuine Elim Tevir hand salutes is by sending your email(s) to: .

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Before we continue, I have a request to make of you. You may or may not know them, but if you’re of a mind to, please say a prayer for the McNally family. Lynette McNally lost her battle with cancer yesterday morning and passed away at the family home. She’s free of her pain and for that we can rejoice.
Moving on.

In other news, President Obama is making ready to address the nation and tell us how the cow ate the cabbage.

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I will give it up that he does give a great speech and if great speeches were all it took to fix all our ills, they we would be in high, high cotton. But it’s gonna take a damned site more than jawing to get ‘er done. The president has got some hard choices to make. I really can’t put much stock in his words in that they are just that; words. For me, the best thing he can do is get up there and say “Oh yeah? Well watch this!”

Oh, yeah and then actually DO something. I don’t care if it’s just some heefing and hamboning, DO SOMETHING!

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One thing is for certain though; he needs to put realistic time tables on things he hopes to achieve. The utterly ineffective stimulus bill got pushed through in record time and we were a hands breadth from having more than 7.000 pages of healthcare “reform” snuck past us in the dark of night. Just come out with some realistic goals, with realistic time tables and we’ll maybe start thinking you have a clue.

But one thing he can (and probably should) crow a little about is the US/Yemeni joint operations that have been killing (not bringing into custody, but rather making dead) the leaders of the Al Qaeda franchise in that area. This is doing it right and I give up the props to a CinC who really wants to act like we’re at war. We need to show these yahoos that we can and will come after you and kill you in your own kitchen.

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In other news, the…
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Umm… Okay.

NOTE TO SELF: Have creative staff checked for brain damage.

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Now I can’t remember what I was ….

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No, that wasn’t it.

It’ll come to me tomorrow probably.

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