The Liquor Talking

The good news is that I’m no longer unemployed. The not-so-good news is that it’s a temp gig, slated to run up to about May.

Which means we’ll get to start this (@*$& job hunting thing all over again in a few months.

But it does pay more than my last gig.

The only real down side (other than being temp) is that there’s a boatload of travel and being gone for a week at a time. Looks to be an interesting gig though. Even though this’ll require only a fraction of my skill set, it’s probably time to get back in the game.

So to the folks that passed me up for someone less qualified:

I’ll be available again, sometime in May. Drop me a line, we’ll do lunch.

Not sure what that means for Les Parler alcools, but I’ll do what I can.

1. Okay, so I’m now officially paying attention to the 2012 elections.

   

   A brief note to the republican presidential candidates on the subject:

   Hi, Sorry that I’ve not been paying very much attention to you for the past year. It’s not that I didn’t care, it’s just a matter of toleration. I can only put up with this sort of thing for so long, then I get angry, then I get apathetic. But, I’m paying attention now and I gotta say, I’m not very much impressed. Speaking as a true conservative, I’m pretty much thinking that none of y’all would make a particulalry good president. Don’t get me wrong, ANY one of you would make a better president than what we got now, but that’s really no major trick. A mentally disabled clam could do better. As a true conservative, I do like a lot of the stuff you guys are saying: Smaller government Lower taxes Fix the economy Fix Medicare/Medicaid and Social Security Fix health care Fix immigration Obama = bad Lots of talk about making the government stop doing things it shouldn’t be doing. I can dig it. What I’m not hearing though is anything about making the government DO the things it’s supposed to be doing. In case you didn’t know, the US Constitution lays this all out for ya’. The Preamble to it sums it up nicely: Establish justice Insure domestic tranquility Provide for the common defense Promote the general welfare Secure the blessing of liberty to ourselves and our posterity. So far, I’ve only heard one candidate mention the Constitution very much and the rest of you are trying to make him out to be a crackpot. I’m not digging this. So in your plans to reign in government, DO NOT forget that there actually ARE things the government is required to do. So good luck, but be warned, I’m the kind of blogger that’ll call bullshit on a republican even faster than I will a democrat. Say/do something stupid and The Liquor Talking will be on you like a cheap suit. Kind regards, Elim Tevir

2. But now I kinda wish I wasn’t paying attention just yet.

   According to New Hampshire state senator Gary Lambert, “It’s not about picking someone even with your own beliefs and principles. This is about picking a person who can beat Barack Obama, period.”

   

   See? See what I gotta put up with? Idiots like this guy are the main reason why I’m one of them there “angry conservatives.”

   It’s a trick folks. We’ve had months and months of “polls” shoved in our faces about which candidate stacks up best against Obama. We’ve now let ourselves believe that this is somehow an important issue, no check that. We’ve been made to think that it’s THE important issue.

   It’s not. The ability to beat Obama in the election is no more important than the ability to beat him at beer pong. Any republican (that’s not a crackpot) can beat Obama in this election. The republican party has an opportunity here to elect a real conservative this go ’round and it looks like there’s at least a couple in the ring this time.

   We can’t go down this road. Unless we nominate a compete lunatic, we will defeat Obama.
   

3. Say hello to Justin Shane Martin.

   

   Then say goodbye.

   Justin learned, the hard way, what happens when you try to force your way into the house of a woman who is armed with a 12 gauge shotgun and the resolve to defend herself and her baby.

   Recently widowed 18 year-old Sarah McKinley was home with her infant son on New Year’s Eve when Martin and his buddy decided to try to force their way into Sarah’s home. Sarah’s husband had passed away from cancer on Christmas day.

   Displaying uncommon calm, Sarah grabbed up a double-barrel shotgun, pushed a couch in front of the door and retreated to the back of the house. She then called 911 and told the dispatcher what was going on. She then asked the dispatcher; “I’ve got two guns in my hand. Is it OK to shoot him if he comes in this door?”

   Thankfully, the dispatcher told her; “I can’t tell you that you can do that, but you have to do what you have to do to protect your baby.”

   Martin finally succeeded in breaking in the door and while trying to shove the couch out of the way, was blasted at a distance of about 22 feet.

   Having “Castle Laws” on the books, Oklahoma authorities have declined to prosecute Sarah and have instead charged Martin’s fellow rocket scientist, 29 year-old Dustin Louis Stewart, with first-degree murder. Seems that in Oklahoma at least, being involved in a criminal act that results in the death of an accomplice is murder.

   I like the way these people think.

   Well, all but that “got worms” thing.